This week I tentatively tip toed on to the scales for the first time since August. I haven’t weighed myself much this year; I made a conscious decision a few years ago that it was a waste of time. Why would I do something that never told me what I wanted to hear when I was quite happy with what I saw and that consequently left me feeling like a grumpy teenager who wanted to slam doors?
I had been wondering why my skinnys were loose (even straight out of the dryer after a hot wash) and to my surprise I had lost half a stone since my 30th birthday in August. Why was it such a surprise? Well, I’ve eaten chocolate nearly every day and more often than not I’m partial to the odd vino or two.
I say it was a surprise but then it wasn’t a surprise at all. I have come to develop my own set of beliefs about weight loss which are working better for me than any crazy diet or extreme exercise have ever worked in the past and since I completely shifted the way I look after myself I have gradually and continuously lost weight.
I want to share with you how losing excess weight (especially those stubborn last 7lbs) and comfortably staying at a weight that is ideal for your frame can be effortless. You can work on this in one of our memberships; although I’m telling you now so you know how easy it can be.
Before we get started I’d like you to ask yourself these questions:
- What rules and restrictions have I created for myself around food?
- How and when do I emotionally eat?
- What are my beliefs about food?
- How do I really feel about exercise?
- How much do I love myself on a scale of 1-10?
I haven’t always had a great relationship with food, I have always gone through phases of binging on sugar and if I wasn’t binging then there was a lot of restriction. At times my thoughts have been completely consumed with what I can and can’t eat…god how boring. Like most women (or at least my circle of friends) I have tried various diets over the years, (The cabbage Soup Diet (rank) The Atkins Diet (too expensive and I love chips) The Dukan Diet (complicated), the list goes on) and although you lose weight initially the sense of restriction has never sat well with me. I’ve never been fat (although I have thought differently in the past) and looking in from the outside you probably wouldn’t think there was a problem. I’d say 50% of the people I know are addicted to sugar in some way or another. The problem was the void that sugar was unknowingly filling for me.
I didn’t really love myself. If someone had told me that then I wouldn’t really have understood what they meant but now it’s all so clear; partying way too hard, peaking and troughing with excessive exercise and with so much restriction around my diet that it would lead to binging. I full heartedly believe that if you do not love yourself you can be as ‘good’ (I’ll come on to how I feel about saying “I’ve been good today” a bit later) as you like but the weight will not stay off and you will continuously be maintaining your weight. Even the word maintain hints at it being an effort.
Do you want to spend the rest of your life maintaining your weight?
A happy body, just like a happy mind and a happy soul starts from within. So if you would say that you can be an emotional eater (in my books an emotional eater is someone who eats if they are angry, sad, lonely, bored, tired, etc) and you feel like you have tried everything to shift that last 7lbs, you are exercising enough and watching what you eat (I’ll come on to how I feel about saying “I’m watching what I eat?” later too) then it’s time to get really honest about those 5 questions I asked you earlier.
I believe permanent and effortless weight loss all starts with loving yourself and I can share with you plenty of personal experiences that make that true for me, the scales don’t lie lol! When you love yourself your life is not about restriction and rules, it’s about giving and saying yes to yourself. “So I can eat whatever I want?” I hear you ask. Well yes but here is the shift, what you want changes.
When you love yourself you only do and say what is best for you. You show yourself love by only putting in your body what you really want and because you fully live by that your beliefs around food change. Chocolate, cake, chips and bread are no longer ‘bad’. Why would you label something as bad and then put it in your body? You naturally desire them less but when you do want it it’s because you really want it and because it’s soooooo good! You no longer use ‘bad’ foods to punish yourself with. Next time you eat something and say “Oh I’ve been so bad today” just take a minute to feel the energy that is created around eating that food. If you really believe that it’s bad then surely it can only do something bad to your body?
Exercise becomes enjoyable, there is no longer a battle in your head about “I should go, I must go. I have to go”. You go because you love it and because you know it is showing yourself love. You take a more relaxed approach to it. I truly believe that exercise has double the potency when you are loving every minute of it. How can it not? You’re sending the signals to your body that this is good and that this is what it needs to live vitally. You haven’t got the time or energy to exercise? These are all side effects of not loving yourself and I promise they shift when your life redirects to come from a place of “What is best for me?”.
This is what has worked for me, it is not a science. I am definitely not saying that you can eat what you like and have a relaxed approach to exercise without taking yourself through a personal development programme like our memberships that will show you to love yourself, like seriously love yourself, head over heels falling smitten belly butterflies in love with yourself.
To start you can consider changing your beliefs around losing weight
- I can eat whatever I want because I always choose what is best for me
- Food is good and always nourishes my body because I love myself
- Exercise is a gift to myself and not a punishment
- Permission to say yes to everything that makes me feel good for the long term
- Every day I am perfect just as I am
If you want a lolly pop head body then this isn’t for you, ask yourself what are you really trying to achieve? It might look good for celebs on the telly or in mags (and they have to work really hard) but having worked in TV it honestly looks odd in real life.
Do you really want to work hard on your diet for the rest of your life?
PS: Stop saying “I’m watching my diet”. Nothing happens quicker because you’re watching it. The definition for watching your diet in the Oxford dictionary is to care, caution, or have restraint about it. I do not want you to care for your diet because that takes effort or to have caution around it as that means there is danger and I definitely do not want you to have restraint because there should be no restraint in loving yourself.