Ditch hangovers without giving up wine and keep your girl’s nights out

Let me set the scene, I’m sure you’ve been there. It’s an average Wednesday evening and you promised yourself that you’d go to that spinning class you’ve been meaning to start for ages. It’s been a long hard day at work and even though you know exercise is exactly what your mind, body and soul need, when your mate says; “Do you fancy going for a quick drink?” without much hesitation you say; “OK, but just for one”. Then the inner dialogue begins. “You should be going to the gym, yes but I deserve it, I’ve worked hard, you know it’s never just for one, I’ll go to the gym afterwards, I can’t be bothered, I feel fat, I hate myself… oh f**k it!”

‘One’ doesn’t stand for a glass any more does it, it means a bottle, right? You go to the bar, spend a minute deciding whether two glasses is that much cheaper than a bottle, figure that you know you’ll have more than one so it’s definitely cheaper than 4 glasses. So you settle on a bottle which then requires your mate to repay an equal favour and buy another bottle. You probably skipped dinner so suddenly your Wednesday evening that had had such good intentions is turning into a blurry eyed, late night tube ride home. Then there is the next morning; a dodgy night’s sleep, the shrill of the alarm, thirsty, heady and a day of work distracted by salty, sugary cravings. Plus it only escalates the nearer to the weekend it is, Thursday night probably involves shots, Friday night you might end up sleeping with someone you regret and then Saturday night could lead to doing a few lines, being up all night and losing your Sunday.

So what happened, how come this keeps happening and why can’t you stick to your good intentions? On the surface you’re probably starting to think that’s just who you are. You can’t help it. I’ve been there too, asking myself why I can’t have just one drink. Why does it need to be all or nothing? Consciously you want to not over drink because your intelligence tells you it will make you feel rough the next day. However subconsciously there’s a whole load of other crap going on.

I’m sharing my experience with you because you might relate to it. I’m not saying what I did will work for everyone but if you find just a small insight in what I am sharing with you then that is awesome.

The problem was that even though I really did want to not feel crap in the morning, underneath it all what I wanted more was to get drunk, I just didn’t realise it. The reason why drinking conquered over all of my good will was because it created a sense of escape and unknowingly, I really needed to escape.

The ‘I’ I am referring to here is the core of who you are. It is a bit like the solid little doll in the centre of a Russian Doll. This ‘I’ is the real you, courageous, confident, brave, wise, full of self love and unbreakable. Life can be scary, stepping out as the real you, not caring what others think, so we choose to protect ourselves with a load of hollow layers that portray confidence on the outside but not on the inside. Those layers are in fact filled with self doubt, comparison, guilt, worry, hurt and self sabotage. Until you choose to lead from your centre and nurture the real you, you will always feel like you need that sense of escapism.

So in short the real reason why you can’t say you’ll have one and mean it is because subconsciously you want to get drunk more than you consciously don’t. I made the decision that I didn’t want to waste any more days feeling rough and annoyed with myself because I drank too much. Essentially I saw that I wasn’t loving myself and I learned how to shed the hollow layers, embrace the real me and let her lead the way.

I’m sure I’m not telling you anything new, you’d have to be hiding under a rock to have not heard about “self love” today. What I hear most commonly is “Lydia, I know I need to love myself, but how?”

One tool I use to work on self love is to put yourself into love training. I would never insult your intelligence and say, “Well just tell yourself that you love yourself”. That’s hard when you feel like you don’t and you’re nobodies fool, especially not your own.

Start by accepting that you want to become better at loving yourself because it’s something that you haven’t been great at because that will mean that you’re in training. Training takes practice and it also means that you are allowed to get it wrong or make mistakes, because you’re learning.

Then you need to start to show yourself love. If you were in a relationship where your partner never said how beautiful you were, bought you flowers, made you tea, picked you up from the station or took you out for dinner, after a while you would start to feel unloved. It’s likely your boyfreind does love you but he just has other things on his mind. Vice versa, if you saw that your partner really needed some love, you’d find a way to give it to them, a text, gesture or gift, even if you weren’t feeling all loved up, you would do it anyway, so that they felt loved.

It’s no different loving yourself, don’t wait to feel it first, take action and show yourself love anyway, you have to be shown love to feel it.

Write down three ways you can start showing yourself love today. You need to be specific, it’s not “Be kinder to myself”, if that was an action what would that be? Run yourself a bath maybe, or make a home cooked meal each day.

Start with these small actions, rather than trying to only have one drink and when your self love is stronger, you will automatically want to do what is best for you, rather than wake up with a hangover.

Let me know how you get on or if you have any questions pop them in the comments box, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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3 Key traits ambitious women need to succeed

I would consider myself to be ambitious, how about you?

  • Do you love to get the most out of life?
  • Do you really enjoy achieving?
  • Do you want to fulfill your potential?

Yes…………..?

Then you’re just like me.

From my own experience and the hundreds of hours I have spent helping ambitious individuals fulfill their potential, I know that these three traits are key for setting yourself up for success.

TRAIT #3: Being seriously focused

I meet lots of awesome people with great ambition BUT their focus is all over the place. They have a handful of different dreams they’re working towards all at the same time and this stops them from being REALLY focused on any of them. Then, because their focus is being split and pulled in five different directions, they get easily distracted by life in general.

It’s not their fault, if you’re ambitious then you want to get the most out of life and do as much as you can and that is awesome, but you need to get really clear on what your goals are and work in priority order to achieve them. We are far more likely to succeed if we focus on one thing, giving it 100% of our time and energy, than focusing on five things and giving them 20% of our energy.

TRAIT #2: Taking action without procrastination

Most of us have a good idea about what we need to do to succeed, but we get slowed down by waiting for the right time, a good feeling or for it to look easy before we actually take action. Procrastinating slows everything down and can leave you questioning yourself to the brink of crazy.

The reason we procrastinate is because we either don’t trust our own judgement and are scared we will make the wrong decision or because we haven’t figured out exactly what we do and don’t want in life. As soon as you have a crystal clear vision for your future (say 12 months ahead) it’s much easier to be able to decide in the moment if you’re making the right decision. Ultimately you have to take action and say yes to what you need to succeed, to see your life moving in the right direction.

TRAIT #1: Not being afraid to get the support you need

The most important and number one trait is not being afraid to get the support you need. I tried to set up Life Cleanse twice before realising flying solo just wasn’t cutting it. I’ve now worked with a number of experts and successful companies to succeed and it was the best decision I could have made. Being ambitious I thought I could do it all by myself and that getting some support would mean I had failed, how wrong was I?

To be successful you need to get support from other people that have already shaped their vision and succeeded. Having something you can rely on that keeps you connected to your vision and focused, as well as relying on yourself, is vital. It’s a big ask to expect yourself to do this alone. Whether that is working with someone who is personally holding you accountable or having a system in place that keeps you on track with your bigger goals, hopes and dreams, knowing that your back is covered, helps you succeed.

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How To Fire Up Your Manifesting Mojo

I’m having a manifestation lull.

I need to remind myself of how powerful I am and that I can create the world I want to see, so it seems only fair to share my personal pick-me-up with you because I know that you’re equally as powerful.

Before I get started, if the word manifest is way too out there for you, then this might not be for you. You do need to believe in being able to manifest what you want or else you’re just Harry without the Potter.

I’m not here to try to convince you, just to share how once again I’m going to start manifesting like a mofo. Take what lands for you and ride off on your unicorn into this magical universe where what you believe creates your reality.

 

Lahdidadaaaaaah….

So, if you’re still with me and you’re keen to find out more, march with me you spiritual soldier.

Attraction magnet.

By thinking, feeling and believing in what you want to see happen in your life you turn into an attraction magnet and can receive all that and more. Up until a few months ago I was like some really cool and well’ard transformer who had these insane magnetic powers but then somewhere along the line the battery ran out… did transformers even have batteries?

A-ny-way, you can become “Attraction Magneto The Transformer” too, you have this ability just as I do and as much as I’d love to say that it is magic, it’s not, it is based on universal laws, which are way too complicated to get into now and science.

Basically, it’s Quantum Physics. I am not a Quantum Physicist nor do I claim to understand the science part fully. I’m happy with the understanding I have because I’ve seen it work for me and that is good enough. So I’m not going to boggle your mind with Quantum Physics because I can’t, thank heavens, but I can do my best to break it down for you left brainers who need some logic.

It’s all about the energy

Life is always moving, it never stands still and as much as we sometimes wish the world would stop turning and give us a break, tomorrow still comes.

So if life is always moving, it means that everything in life is energy. To make something move it needs an energy source, whether it’s fuel in a car or sun for your solar panel. We make our lives move, we are that energy source and the energy we provide is emotion.

Emotion is energy in motion, e – motion.

So depending on which emotional signals we are sending out and whether they are positive or negative, we will create positive or negative movement in our lives.

Secondly, the frequencies we send out can be picked up by everything else in the world because everything is transmitting a frequency on some kind of level. When these frequencies match, you become connected and act as a receiver, just like a radio.

You know that saying “like attracts like”? Positive emotions have a really high frequency so when you are feeling really happy or excited you connect with other high frequencies hence attracting more positive, good stuff into your life. Dudaaaah!

Are you excited?

I’m very much a right brain kinda gal, so I just go and create, which I have been doing a lot of lately but not the right kind. Being stuck behind a laptop developing has tuned me right out and into a low frequency.

Excitement is the best emotion for manifesting because it has a high frequency. It’s powerful stuff. Think of a time when you’ve been really excited about something, you’re buzzing right? You can feel it in your body, you’re giving off good vibes man. You don’t have to say anything and people will say “You’re very happy to today, what’s up with you?”

As I explained earlier, being excited about what’s in the future will bring it to you more quickly. However, to be excited about something you need to know and believe that it’s on its way. I’m not saying that I’ve not been excited, because I am. But to manifest like a mofo, that stuff’s gotta be strong, like seriously uncontainable. So now that I’m nearing the end of what’s been a year of laptop development, I need to step it up and if you’d like to join me, you can too.

Just follow these steps and see if you feel your energy creeping up.

CAUTION: Beware of limiting beliefs!!
They’re nasty little critters that will slow the process down to a halt. A warning sign that they’re loitering is if when you’re harnessing your attraction power you hear things like “This is a load of BS”,
“I doubt this will happen to me” or
“I’m not good enough”

You can see what’s hanging around in your belief closet by writing down all of the reasons why you think it won’t work. Then ask yourself “How is thinking this supporting me and what do I need to change it to?”

Ok so here’s what I am going to do:

  1. Visualise my future every day in a 10 minute meditation until I can feel the excitement.
  2. I’m going to do an intention –board which means specifically choosing my photos so they relate to my intentions rather than being guided by my intuition and emotions as you are with a mood-board.
  3. I’m going to write on my note board “Be excited” as a reminder in case I get lost in the last few stages of development.

Manifestation and attraction can become a complicated matter. If this inspires further enquiry for you then I recommend reading The Law of Attraction by Esther and Gerry Hicks.

Feeling more excited already

Thanks for reading xx

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